Hugh Hugh Barney Magrew! Garthy thought 4s were at Trumpton.

Published On: May 23, 2021Categories: News and Reports

4th Team Report 22/05/2021
I was asked to report on the action at this weeks 4th team match and send it over the wire to our Club Repoter in Chief Fingers Bowman.
Now there may be some references in this report that some of you may have to ask your parents, or even Grandparents on the background of said comparisons/references.
I thought the Captain said we were playing Trumpton but on not being able to find the Fire Station and Hugh,Hugh, Barney Magrew, Cuthbert, Dibble and Grubb, I arrived at Plumpton and got Hugo, Luke,Mike Burney, Adam Zabi and Statto.
This section of the team were all under 30,actually 3 of them were under 14, but it’s all about the clubs Youth policy!!
The rest of the team were from Last of the Summer Wine with the Wiley old Silver Fox, that is Jona, Baby Giraffe Watson(also his Mafia name) Andy(Hamlet moment ) Smith, Captain Stephen Oliver DSO and myself, crushing said Youth policy.
We won the toss and fielded, Statto looking hungry for success, if success is an Amex meat pie( as seen on Soccer AM,)
New players Mike and Luke, thankfully fit, fast willing and able, and with a damp pitch and fortunately warmish atmosphere we opened the bowling with the youngsters Hugo and Adam Ibrahim(2nd best Fantasy Cricket player in his household after Zuni).
Now I am going to blow my own trumpet but I did catch a Worldy and no-one, including the batsmen believed I had or could have caught it as he stood motionless in awe before he walked.
Hugo chuffed to bits that someone old enough to be his Grandad had given him his first adult cricket wicket, then went on to knock the next batsmen’s off stump out and we had then at 12 for 2.
Plumpton then had a purple patch and suddenly they were 68 for 2, but we had our Grey patch in the Wiley old Silver Fox that is Jona! Who on being asked to bowl the immediate next over by Captain Oliver, snarled and snapped back in Jona style asking for at least another 12 overs to pass as his warm up time is not what it used to be.
His first victim was caught by Andy Smith when the heavens opened and off we went which was an opportunistic time for a very pleased catcher to get out his cigars and have a smug Hamlet moment to celebrate his contribution to the game.
Newcomers Mike and Luke bowled well and fielded superbly(well I say superbly but what I mean is, they can run and stop the ball, unlike us golden oldies who prefer the ball to be within 1 foot of us and preferably above knee height).
Young Zabi moved the ball about and was rewarded with a wicket.
Adam I showed us why he’s a gimme in anyone’s Fantasy Team.
Statto used his whole surface area to stop the ball and Baby Giraffe Watson atoned himself after dropping a sitter to catching a sitter(just….after some impressive juggling)
Jona got 3-17 off 8 overs
Hugo 2-16
Mike 2-18 off 5
1 each for Adam and Zabi
1 run out.
Plumpton finished on 156 all out, although like Junior Cricket the 3rd highest scorer was Mr Extra(25)and 2 of the batting side accumulated 100.
Captain Oliver was very pleased with this( in his seemingly calm uncompetitive way) as it was maximum bowling points and a great all round effort, with everyone contributing to a team effort in the field.
Then it rained,the Plumpton Captain and Captain Oliver got there calculators out, which shocked the youngsters, but was required due to the rain, but neither of them could work out the answer so it was agreed that we would worry about it later.
It was great to be served a cup of tea from a club house for the first time since 2019 and a quick turnaround was had.
Now during tea, Statto hid in the dressing room as Zuni was preparing her barrage of ‘What if’ questions relating to the Fantasy League, luckily she had to concentrate on scoring (thank you for this Zuni) so Statto could come out of hiding and finish his Pie fest.
Jona went for a well earned sleep in his car and we went out to bat.
Graham and Mike had a go but Mike was caught by the second best catch of the game and Graham was dropped twice before Plumpton got him 3rd time lucky.
Jona woke up startled by what he thought was thunder, only to realise that Plumptons Wicky and slip and both fallen on the ground at the same time causing tremors.
Adam and Captain Oliver were in, but it rained and poured of the roof of the clubhouse and then we had a pretty rainbow but no gold at the end of it, just a very wet outfield so match called off.
A good effort by both teams to attempt to play and a great team effort from a very mixed age Nomads team with encouraging signs of the youngsters coming through.

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